Hope in Therapy

I don't like therapy.

I am practiced at avoiding, suppressing, repressing, compartmentalizing and just generally not dealing with tgt (the gay thing).  Since that is the major presenting issue at therapy it has been a a hard road.

Today however I see a light at the end of the tunnel and am reasonably certain that it is not a train bearing down on me.  The therapist and  I talked about both the baby steps I am doing and some more I can do to continue to move toward being who I am.  Right now I am hopeful.  I dread the conversation that is in the reasonably near future with C.  But I believe the conversation is possible. 

Interestingly, just as therapy was ending C called to say that our oldest's therapist thinks that my coming out to the kids would be a good thing.  Another hurdle to talk about next week.  I may not be bursting down the doors of the closet, but I am standing up and fighting to be who I am.

It is said that hope springs eternal.  I'm not so sure abut the eternal piece, but know am committed to nurturing that hope as I continue to move toward being who I am.