Saturday, April 30, 2011

Following Directions

So at the last appointment at the therapist she says maybe you should tell C what you are thinking of in terms of a time line and ask her what she needs from you.  My time line was and is that I don't really have a set one.  I see this moving forward organically and slowly.  I do not have one foot out the door.  I also do not know if some sort of alternative plan will work where we are under the same roof - I think I've mentioned that before.  I also want to make sure that C is set - I am not about leaving her high and dry.

So - what to I do when I get home?  I withdraw from C in order to give her space.  She interprets this to mean that I do have one foot out the door and that I discussed that with the therapist on Tuesday.  So she spends Wednesday and Thursday in this while I go about my business in oblivion.  Job interviews on Wednesday seemed to go well.

On Friday we talk.  I can be an oblivious a**hole.

Goal - communicate better.  Don't assume people know what's going on in my head.  Hell I don't know what's going on in there half the time.

Today a much better day.  Still on the road, still moving toward separation, still hurts.

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