It is obvious, to me at least, that I've done a great job a moving intentionally and slowly. So good a job that at times there seems to be no movement whatsoever. For me at least the last post was freeing. It explained to myself some of the reason. I do find it interesting and amazing the lengths we go to not be who we are/feel what we feel. Or rather I should say I am amazed at my capacity. All those terms that were so hard to understand when I first encountered them (projection, transference) now make sense.
But anyway C and I went out to dinner today once I got home from work. On the way we talk about therapy. I tell her S is looking to get a therapist who will do couples. C tells me she does not need one for her stuff - true for the most part - but that couples is needed since our "relationship has changed so much recently." C then recounts that our oldest has asked her to stop making jokes about divorce. You may recall I think the oldest has an inkling. It seems C has been making jokes of that sort at least around the kiddos. I'm not sure whether the oldest is protecting the oldest or the siblings.
So it seems there is some passive sort of movement. I will have to keep a push on in therapy to move towards couples. I want to avoid that, but know it's time to forge ahead.